Today my 4 year old nephew laid it on the line, "Why you don't have no kids?" to which I responded, "I don't know". I pondered for a minute trying to explain to my nephew how desperately we've tried for more than a year now, how twice now I've had my heart broken with what could have been, and how just today I had to accept once again that this was not the month. He's 4 though and while smart enough to realize that I am old enough and should have kids I don't think he would understand.
TTC has become my life over the past year and it is not the i.de.al one I've dreamed of. I just never thought it would be so hard. First it was charting and temp taking, then on to opk's and acupuncture, tests and more tests, pills and shots, peeing and more peeing.........nothing but disappointment and a few extra pounds around the middle. UGHHHH!
Time for a break though and a new chapter. I have let my exercise go by the wayside as well as my healthy eating. I have a plan so stay tuned as I explore crossfit and a paleo way of life. This is not going to be easy but hopefully I will regain what I've lost over the past year or rather lose what I have gained.
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